An Open Plea to Facebook

21 Sep

Dear Facebook,

Not to sound like a hipster, but I have been a loyal follower since- gosh I can’t believe I’m saying this- before it was even cool. I created my page back in 2006, a simpler time when everything made sense. Ah, the glory days.

In the last three years you have taken this simple social networking site and changed it so many times that no one even knows what to do with it anymore. People are even creating articles like this, from Gizmodo, as a sad attempt to explain your Facebook updates. I was about to sit down and really focus on this article, but then I realized that nowadays the Facebook guys change the layout more often than I sneeze, so I wrote this post instead.

When I log into this new page I have no idea what is going on. Stories from two, three hours ago are pasted between brand new updates, so I haven’t a clue what is actually happening at this moment. There’s a weird update bar that just seems annoying to read, and the pictures have been magnified to a really ridiculous size. I know plenty of people have logged on this morning to see what was up and reacted the same way as I did… Oh no not again… but I can’t tell since all of my complaint- updates are somewhere in cyber space where I’ll never see them.

As a loyal Facebook-er I am begging you to just stop. Social networking works because it is simple, or at least it used to be. Nowadays I find myself more drawn to Twitter or blogs because at least I know what to expect. Facebook has become this annoyance, no longer sending update e-mails and moving things around so much that it really doesn’t even compute with me anymore. I think I speak for many people when I say that we as a market like simple. We like that Facebook once gave us the opportunity to shoot onto our page five minutes before work, check out what’s new really quick and maybe leave a pointless and annoying status (something like “is going to work!! lol!!” or something else that makes every other reader think… OH MY GOD WHO CARES!?). These were easy and fast ways to be apart of the world of social media, and now it has been turned into a complicating process of updates and scrolling. No, thank you.

There have been many times through all these changes that I have even considered leaving Facebook because it’s just too darn annoying to relearn and it’s getting old, but you have me trapped in your web of annoying statuses and drunken pictures. In all honesty I only keep my page still because I have friends all over the world that I would lose contact with if I did not have the page. Now that I’m slowly transitioning into a somewhat responsible adult, I have friends getting engaged or married, having non-accidental babies, moving into apartments and homes, things that I would like to know about without searching for twenty minutes. My biggest concern is that all of this will no longer be evident, and Facebook will turn into a big old waste of my time (not that it isn’t already but…).

I know that you know that I can’t leave Facebook, but stop dangling that power struggle over my head and give us all a break!

You used to be cool,

A concerned social media stalker

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